They said be nice. I said be real.

Being this unbothered takes practice.

I have a black belt in eye rolling.

I'm not rude. I'm honest in HD.

Your vibe called. It wants a refund.

Honesty hour: I wasn't listening.

My sarcasm has sarcasm.

That's a you problem.

Your energy is loud. Mine is louder.

Rolling my eyes so hard I can see my brain.

Throwing shade? No, just blocking the sun for you.

I'm not saying I'm perfect, but I'm pretty close.

Your drama doesn't match my outfit.

Shade is my favourite colour.

Be yourself. Unless you're annoying. Then be quiet.

I'd tell you a joke about my patience, but it ran out.