This comment brought to you by boredom.

I've read menus with more personality.

You tried. The internet noticed.

Hot take? More like room temperature.

I'd explain it to you, but I don't have that kind of time.

My haters never miss a post. Loyal, honestly.

Thanks for the view, the comment and the free promotion.

Your hate is just my engagement.

I'm not arguing. I'm watching you lose.

The audacity. The typos. The drama.

You're allowed to not like me. You're just not allowed at my table.

Big words, small facts.

You sound like a bad review of yourself.

Try again when you have a real argument.

You're mad. I'm glowing. We're both doing our best.

I'd roast you, but I don't cook for free.