I need a nap and a new personality.

Currently accepting applications for someone to do my laundry.

If you need me, I'm in my blanket fort.

My phone is at 100% and I'm at 5%.

The weekend went by faster than my paycheck.

I have two moods: hungry and sleepy.

Here for a good time, not a long time. Especially at meetings.

I'm the reason the group chat has trust issues.

Mentally, I'm still in bed.

Monday called. I didn't pick up.

I'm not clumsy, the floor just loves me.

My texting speed is fast, my reply speed is not.

My brain is a browser with 47 tabs open.

My hair has a mind of its own, and it's not a nice one.

Let me overthink this and get back to you.

If you need me, I'm in my blanket fort.