Calories? I prefer to call them flavour points.

I'm not bossy, I just have better ideas.

Proud member of the "5 more minutes" club.

I tried to be productive but the couch won.

I need a nap and a new personality.

I'm not ignoring you, I'm just really into this nap.

Keep calm and pretend you know what you're doing.

Some people have abs. I have snacks.

Let me overthink this and get back to you.

My brain is a browser with 47 tabs open.

Life update: I finally folded the laundry. Just kidding.

Every day I wake up and choose snacks.

I can't adult today. Please leave a message.

Water, check. Snacks, check. Motivation, not found.

Out of office: mentally, emotionally, physically.

Here for a good time, not a long time. Especially at meetings.